father-inlaw dating four months after divorse.should i be ok with this? | |
my spiritual side can't accept this.my human side says is ok his divorse.my mother-inlaw is still very hurt and almost went crazy when she found out he had taken the lady to one of his douthers so everyone could meet her.my husban and i refused to meet her and when he asked if he could come over to my home i told him i couln't have that lady in my home,but that he himself was very welcome in my home. they were married by church so i belive what god has united no man can separate. to tell you the truth they really didn't have a good reason to divorse. they just refused to get helped. they were each hoping that the other one would apologize,it never happen.they had been married for almost 40yrs.i myself have been married to my husban for 12yrs so i have been with the family for a while.i just can tell my douther "this is your grandfathers girl friend"what do you guys think?
Answers:
From: Jen
i can understand how you guys must feel, especially the ex-wife.
if this new woman had nothing to do with the marriage break-up then i think you guys should give her some slack because the father-in-law is now dating her, but if she was involved somehow in the marriage break-up, then i can understand your point and i wouldn't be inviting her over either. be nice to your father-in-law though and tell him out of respect for your mother-in-law, you don't feel you can invite his grilfriend over. this would cause more hurt and more divisiveness in the family, but perhaps at a later time that might be ok...
From: Mark
i think that some one who was married for 40 years would certainly need more than four months to recover enough to be able to love another. on the other hand he is your father and you need to love him and respect his choice. i think it would be ok to let him know that you are concerned about his choice to marry so quickly but also let him know that you love him and want to continue to have a relationship with him.
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